Mine and Noah's NICU Experience - Written by:Angela Perry
Noah Craig, my first and only child, was born in the Royal Brisbane & Women's Hospital on 23rd January 2011. Noah's birth was traumatic to say the least. He was whisked to the NICU immediately following his arrival. He spent six days in the NICU before losing his fight for life. Despite Noah passing away I could not have asked for better care for my son.
The nurses were so attentive and cared for him so well that I named them "Noah's other mothers". They allowed me to be involved in Noah's care every step of the way. Just being able to change his nappy and push his nasogastric feeds (of my milk) was such a lovely experience and so crucial for me as his Mummy.
Noah's specialist was also amazing! I am bewildered by the fact that one person can possess so many good qualities! Not only is he super intelligent but also very compassionate. He even came in to the NICU on his day off to check on my boy!
I guess I could write a book here but really I want to share two stand-out conversations I had with staff whilst Noah was in the NICU. The day Noah arrived I was quite 'out-of-it' and it wasn't until about 12 hours after I gave birth that one of the Doctors came to see me. She was so lovely and explained in detail what Noah had been through and what we were facing. Once she had finished explaining all of this she then took my hand and said "Noah may still die but I want you to know there is nothing you could have done differently". At the time I didn't really appreciate what she was saying but upon reflection I have found that sentence alone so very comforting. When Noah was only a few days old his specialist discussed Noah's poor prognosis with me. He asked me to consider turning off Noah's life support.
I found this to be a very hard decision to make. One of the older nurses in the NICU could see I was struggling with this proposal. She approached me later that day and said to me "You don't have to make this decision right now. Noah will let you know if and when he has had enough". Easily the best advice anyone has ever given me. So I did just that. I spoke with Noah later on and asked him to give me a sign when he'd had enough. A few days later Noah took a turn for the worse. The difference on this day was that he no longer appeared comfortable. His tiny but gorgeous little face was screwed up as though he was in a lot of pain. He was having rolling seizures. It was heart-breaking. This was the sign...
♥ ♥ ♥ A person that loses a partner is called a widow. A child who loses a parent is called an orphan. But there is no word to describe a parent that loses a child, because the loss is like no other. ♥ ♥ ♥
Think of someone you know or love who has lost a baby or a child, and take a few minutes to remember & honour their beautiful angels.
"I have mountains yet to climb,but know that all that separates us is, but only time.
I promise precious little one, that there will come a day, that I will see your face again, together we will stay."
I'm writing this letter as I'm feeling a little blue. I hope you don't think I'm asking too much of you. You visit every year and leave us such wonderful things, but I'm wondering if you visit all the ones who have wings? I know you are very busy, so much to do in one night, but could you please make an extra trip to the stars that shine so bright?
You see my son lives up there, just too perfect for life on earth, no presents I could send to truly show their worth. Please leave him a gift and put a stocking on his cloud, filled full of precious presents from his family on the ground. Please stroke his sleepy head and tell him I love him so. If you could do this for me Santa, I may even be able to smile, even if it is just for a little while. So thank you very much Santa for all that you do, after all it is Christmas in heaven too xx.